The Indian attitude to marriages is witnessing a perceptible shift writes Anuradha Gupta , Founder and CEO, Vows for Eternity

It is a tale as old as time, or at least the beginning of the 21st century, where two families introduce their children to each other and see if they make a perfect match for marriage. But, long gone are those days. Arranged marriages have evolved a thousand fold over the years, with the individual getting married having an equal say in the matter, as opposed to earlier times when the families called all the shots.

Not only there has been a change in how arranged marriage set-ups work, but also the way matchmakers function. Matchmakers are seeing a significant shift in attitudes toward arranged marriages and evolving preferences of prospects to ensure their interests and priorities are taken care of. Indian matchmaking in today's era is completely driven by the choice, opinion, compatibility and agreement of both the people, instead of traditional methods where Indian families relied on referrals, which had limited choice and lack of control. This tailored approach is part of what’s contributing to matchmakers’ success. 

It is interesting to see how people have started to speak about marriage and modern relationships shrugging away from the world of biodatas and beginning to appreciate the progressive nature of this in-depth matchmaking search. People have become more aware of what they need from their partner, they look for compatible wavelengths, common interests, and ambitions. 

The appeal of matchmakers comes down to looking beyond a basic checklist and focusing on an individual’s mind-set, values, and personality. People are relying on experts with modern-day approach that fit with the contemporary ideology, which commonly is more about meeting people with similar values and interests that is critical in finding the right partner. Modern matchmaking platforms are giving the singles and their families the power of choice, privacy and time without getting concerned by the stereotypical relatives at every family gathering.

Today, an increasing number of young people are pursuing education and careers away from home, bringing with them the challenges of adjusting to a new environment, re-establishing a social circle, and, most importantly, finding someone to come home to. This is a generation rewriting the social and cultural fabric of India by questioning patriarchal gender roles that have remained unchanged through centuries. As a result, increasing number of Indian millennials view the matchmaking process with a progressive outlook and are willing to themselves enrol for it. It is here when contemporary matchmakers come to the rescue of these modern young adults looking for love and compatibility in an arranged setting. They do not only help in finding the right match for millennials who do not have the time or opportunity to find one, but also guide them through the process. This stems from their deep understanding of the millennial mind-set and preferences, to find ‘the one’ in this milieu of expectations. These matchmakers combine the best of both worlds: the trust factor of traditional arranged marriages and the charm of dating the person you want to marry. Modern matchmakers not only take the time to understand the individual needs of those looking for a partner, but also keep the process 100 per cent transparent. 

Going beyond the gender roles, even women are more assertive, whether it is in terms of equality in power sharing and active participation in decision making. It is no longer a decision taken after one or two meetings, the process is very fluid with there being no cookie-cutter approach to both the individuals giving their verdict. Yet, 'No' is also an option. 

As we go into the future, offline matchmaking platforms look certain to continue to grow at high speed. Nothing can substitute a personal connection, more so in the matters of the heart. Here, everything is offline because that’s where real life plays out. However, the fact remains that the underlying foundation of any relationship is trust, friendship, loyalty and love and no marriage is complete without that healthy mix; and equally finding who helps you grow and make a better partnership with you.